About the Book
Have you ever thought about why even the most loving parenting efforts can fail, why teenage life can be so difficult, why leaders get caught up in personal agendas, why policies serve some people and leave others behind, and why life presents one problem after another?
No matter how much we strive or achieve, we still face natural laws and conditions that can overpower our will and might. We still face change, uncertainty, illness, loss, death, and failure. No one escapes these realities. Even the most intelligent, wealthy, and powerful among us are susceptible to pain and suffering.
It’s Not Easy to Be Human is a good-news book!
A compassionate journey toward greater understanding, capability, and hope. It does not blame us for failing act with skills we may never have been taught. Instead, it helps us understand what happens as we grow up and shows us that these essential human capacities can be learned, practiced, and strengthened throughout life.
It explains how we can train ourselves to align with—and even leverage—change, uncertainty, loss, failure, and other realities we cannot control.
It teaches us how to live in alignment with the nature of life rather than continually fighting against it.
Author Dr. Manijeh Motaghy is an organizational psychologist, UCLA Mindful Affiliate Teacher, and creator of the Mindful Life Optimization (MLO) methodology. Drawing from psychology, neuroscience, mindfulness, critical thinking, systems thinking, contemplative wisdom, and decades of teaching, she examines the emotional, psychological, neurological, societal, systemic, and ecological reasons behind our struggles.
The book explains why people become caught in thoughts and assumptions that may not be true, cycles of stress and emotional reactivity, harmful habits, relationship conflict, and discontentment—and how these patterns can contribute to systems that do not always support human or planetary well-being.
Across 60 lessons, readers explore the human mind and behavior, relationships, constructed systems, sustainable living, and the conditions that contribute to happiness or suffering. These lessons address fundamental qualities and skills that people of every background and identity deserve the opportunity to develop and benefit from.
Rather than simply presenting facts and perspectives, the book introduces a Five-Stage Human Software Optimization process that helps readers move from intellectual understanding to personal verification, deliberate practice, transformation, and continued optimization. Through this process, readers develop greater Life Intelligence: the capacity to understand the natural laws that govern our lives, know our role within life, relate effecively to others, create conscious and responsible systems, and live responsibly within the natural world. Developing this Life Intelligence creates greater ease and joy.
Put simply, this book does more than give you answers—it teaches you how to fish: how to examine experience, make better choices, and gain more conscious and active control over how you shape your life and happiness.
Dr. Motaghy’s vision is to help optimize the lives of one billion people by 2042 and make the development of these fundamental human qualities and skills a human right. You, beloved reader, are part of this essential legacy.
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“Most books tell you what to think. This one invites you to think better. It draws from neuroscience, psychology, mindfulness, systems thinking and lived experience without disappearing into academic jargon or spiritual clichés. It’s evidence-informed, deeply human, and surprisingly practical.”
—Goodreads reviewer, Matthew July 18, 2026
“It’s Not Easy to Be Human is a guide for modern life, focusing on transforming our human experiences, both positive and negative, into a sustainable and happy life for individuals and the general health of the planet.”
—Elizabeth Rothman, Attorney and Adviser in Intellectual Property, AI Ethics, and Tech Policies
“Each chapter and the Mindful Life Optimization Lessons (MLOLs) offer invaluable insights. The book is crafted with care and compassion.… While it may not be easy to be human, this book offers many lessons that make our collective experience easier.”
—Jennifer W., Goodreads review, July 9, 2026
“Her Mindful Life Optimization model breaks down complex emotional and psychological patterns into something I could actually recognize in myself and begin to work with.… This is not just a book of ideas; it’s a guide with real tools.”
—Diane, Amazon reviewer
“Everyone faces difficulties and challenges in life, and this book serves as a guiding light for those who are searching for hope, healing, and a way forward. It offers meaningful insights, comfort, and encouragement to anyone navigating life’s challenges.”
—Gohar Vardanyan, Amazon reviewer
“This book helped me traverse a divorce and mourn a life I once envisioned.… Great book for anybody that wants to become a better human and gain wisdom.”
—Jessica, Amazon reviewer
“Dr. Manijeh Motaghy shines a bright light on how our thoughts and behaviors can trap us and teaches wise, skillful ways on ‘how’ to get unstuck.”
—TripleC, Amazon reviewer
“The book clearly defines the means to practice objective and clear thinking, truly effective listening, patience and resilience, allowing us to minimize bias and focus on our personal goals and organizational goals.”
—From Awareness to Effectiveness, verified Amazon reviewer
Excerpt from the Venerable Ajahn Pasanno’s Forward:
….. “The book tries to use a modern framework of concepts, investigation of systems, and a more global awareness in a search into the age-old questions of how to live with a freedom from dissatisfaction and to live with happiness as our foundation.
These are worthy topics of exploration and, hopefully, the reader will find attitudes, perspectives, tools, and models of lifestyle that will be relevant and useful. Manijeh’s wish for transformation is important to recognize as possible for anyone who puts their attention to reflection and training.”
All good wishes, Pasanno Bhikkhu
About the Author
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Dr. Manijeh Motaghy is an Organizational Psychologist and UCLA Affiliate Mindfulness teacher. Her experience in teaching and developing thousands of people through her non-profit, Perfectly Here, as well as training teams and executives at fortune 500 companies such as Disney, Health Net, and Kaiser afforded her deep insight into the inner workings of the human mind and reasons for getting stuck in emotional and relational difficulties.
She has designed and implemented hundreds of courses and retreats, published hundreds of blogs, and spoken at numerous conferences and summits and universities globally.
Manijeh has a rich and distinct background rooted in Buddhist traditions and a solid grasp of organizational psychology, conscious leadership, and training adult ADHD. As a teacher, she has an incredible ability to connect with groups and individuals, fostering meaningful human connections. Her extensive life experiences enrich her teaching, making her insights deeply impactful.
Her “Mindful Life Optimization” (MLO), is a comprehensive guide for individuals, teams, and organizations. It provides actionable strategies for integrating personal development with broader societal and environmental goals, emphasizing how we can nourish and flourish as a local and global community.
Manijeh is actively involved in various conferences, podcasts, and speaking engagements, striving to share her ambitious and inspiring vision through MLO: to bring MLO to over one billion people worldwide by 2042 to facilitate personal growth and well-being and planetary health, making her contributions essential in our quest for a more harmonious world.
Most importantly, Manijeh shares how she learned the art of self-analysis and Mindful Life Intelligence, healed her childhood traumas and the pain of an immense grief over the loss of her son, and gained optimal inner peace and joy.